*Nanini* Today I present you my first-ever guest post, written by Kevin Hunter. We started talking a bit, and I’m very sure we can benefit a lot from each other’s views and experiences! Enjoy! =) Also check out my guest post on his blog!*/Nanini*
The fact that you are reading this right now, means that, You = Awesome.
I don’t know what it is, but I just wanted to share VAST amounts of knowledge today
…but not just any knowledge
and definitely not for my typical audience.
My name is Kevin Hunter, writer for The Psyche of Men, and I teach men how to find success in the areas of health, wealth and sex.
After being in a relationship through puberty and the majority of my adolescent years, my ex and I broke up and I realized that I had lost all of my social skills, especially when interacting with women. I stumbled into the world of pick up artistry and just ingrained everything that I learned about attraction, seduction and confidence into my subconscious.
What did I learn?
The majority of men that you meet are not what they really seem.
You may be at a bar, in a club, or even just walking through the mall and happen to catch glimpse of a man “checking you out”.
There are only two reasons for why he didn’t come say hi.
1. He is purposeful.
(At the mall to buy xyz and get out, he’s with his friends, or he has a girlfriend)
2. He is socially anxious.
In society today, men have become extremely socially anxious when it comes to meeting new people, both higher-perceived status men or any woman.
The reasons it’s men with a higher perceived status and just women, is because these socially anxious men place women on an insurmountable pedestal that makes the thought of speaking to an attractive girl, almost impossible.
The reason we see this so often today is because men aren’t taught how to be confident anymore. We aren’t taught how to be leaders, and we aren’t taught how to attract women.
The most important thing to understand is that men who are successful, confident, attractive, and just naturally turn you on through their conversation, learned those skills from someone.
It may have been his father, it may have been an older brother, or it may have been a dating coach.
Enter, the world of the PUA.
The Bad & The Ugly
A PUA (poo-ah) is an acronym for “pick-up artist” and has developed quite the bad reputation in recent years.
Fake, manipulate, misogynistic..
…and I don’t disagree with you.
People believe this because Pick Up Artistry provides men with the tools necessary to manipulate women into sleeping with them.
It’s like you hand a man an instruction manual on “How to Have Sex with a Woman You Just Met”
Fvck yeah he’s going to read it.
Men are taught that you need to attract her, hook her, bounce her to different locations, then close.
And yes, that means fvcking her.
Here’s a little insight into the world of the PUA
First, the PUA community teaches men how to build attraction with a woman, but it’s not done with the typical “pick up line”.
PUAs learn that before they approach a girl, they have to overcome their Approach Anxiety. Even though this sounds fake, 80% of men deal with it every single time they see a girl they want to talk to.
But if for the rare chance that a man overcomes their approach anxiety, he has to then build attraction.
Men learn that in order to do this, they should ask an open-ended opinionated question, thus followed by a “Neg” aka back-handed compliment.
My favorite that I always had success with was, “You’re cute and funny, are you sure your hair isn’t naturally blonde?” – It’s light, it’s playful and it’s pushing her a way while pulling her closer.
This is PUA Attraction 101. Scripted Lines that have proven results.
This isn’t natural, this isn’t real. PUAs will use the same line on hundreds of women.
Because it works.
He will create a sense of mystery by telling you polar-opposing things such as, “Today was horrible”, then explain how great his day was.
No matter how his day really went, he will give you and every girl he meets the same answer, because why wouldn’t he? It works.
The mentality behind a PUA is just like that of a video game.
The first time you beat Level 1, it may have been hard, but if you do it again and follow the same exact steps, it will be much easier to beat it the second time around.
So PUAs will use the same scripted lines over and over because they will get the same results.
Here is where the problem lies.
The best PUAs are nothing more than COPIES of Men who are actually confident, attractive and showing great personalities.
I say this because after a PUA has followed through with his Steps 1 – Sex, he will be just a lost, scared little boy that is afraid of the world and what comes next.
So he leaves….aka, the one night stand
It’s not to say that I, or other real men, don’t have one night stands
..sometimes levels of attraction just skyrocket when actually compatibility falls short.
The reality of PUAs is this. They are ACTING like real men from the outside, but they aren’t being congruent to who they are internally.
Imagine the character, Christian Gray…
That dude exudes confidence. He is passionate about everything he does, he owns companies and has people working for him at all times, and is very comfortable with his own sexuality and bringing girls into his world.
Internally PUAs have no passion, they have no purpose, and they’re just playing the game and want sex.
I am going to tell you something that will probably piss you off..
But remember, even men who are naturally successful with women do this subconsciously.
…even Christian Grey and Ryan Gosling.
It’s the idea of building a woman’s attraction like a progress bar.
Let’s be conservative and use the The Heroin Addict analogy.
Ever done Heroin?
I haven’t, but I hear it’s pretty fvcking addictive.
Imagine that Heroin = Attraction.
Say you meet this girl and she wants some heroin…so naturally, as a guy who has some, you give her a little bit of heroin, you see that she likes it, so you give her a little more, then maybe a little more…but not enough to make her overdose. Once you’ve given her enough heroin, you stop entirely.
What happens next?
She comes back to you wanting more and more heroin.
The idea behind having good “game” with a woman is such that he has to give attraction, give attraction, give attraction, but before he over validates her, he stops entirely. At that point, a woman WILL desire and NEED him inside of her.
But if you give her too much attraction, she will “overdose” on your attraction and lose it all together.
Yes, it’s true. This is Female Psychology 101.
These are some of the things that PUAs have learned through observation and emulate for themselves. But the difference between a real man and a PUA is that one is conscious and one is subconscious.
Now let’s turn the tables and let me tell you why you should LOVE PUAs.
As we were talking about before, the men that enter the community of PUAs are socially anxious, not confident, purposeless and passionless.
Not qualities you would often (ever) find attractive in a man.
This lack of attraction comes from the notion that they offer no value to the world – and it tears them apart.
At it’s core, Attraction = Value.
Let’s take a step back and look at PUAs from a Macro scale.
They are filled with anxieties, have no confidence and have no passion.
Let’s start there.
Men who are just starting out, must learn to get over their approach anxiety. It’s not easy walking up to the most beautiful woman you’ve seen and introduce yourself. That shit takes guts, it takes a willingness to leave behind the person you know and struggle with the pain of rejection in order to get over the social anxiety that you were filled with.
So a man who is learning to get over approach anxiety, is working to become a more social man.
When you teach a man how to use scripted lines, use proper “breaking rapport” vocal tonalities, and how to speak with powerful body language, he may be feeling extremely unnatural. He accepted that he wasn’t a confident man before, but is taking steps to become one.
Confidence is defined as the feeling or belief that one can rely on someone. His attention to detail knowledge and that if he acts this way, he will BE confident, IS confidence.
When a man enters the community of PUAs, he accepts that his life isn’t what he hoped it would be and he knows that he has much greater potential for himself. Although he isn’t striving to get complete a big project at work or build his own business, he is actually working on the biggest project of all time. Himself.
PUAs are infact some of the hardest working men. They are willing to sacrifice everything they have ever known, throw it all away, with the purpose of becoming the kind of guy that can attract women.
This is purpose.
This is passion.
Although there are still PUAs out there, the industry has greatly commercialized and has become less external manipulation to women and more internal change in men.
In my school of thought, men should not learn to use routines that build attraction or learn magic tricks that instill a false perception of value towards women, but instead, men should find a purpose, find their passion, set goals and work to accomplish them before even attempting to approach women.
My goal is to help 150,000 men change their lives from purposeless boys into passion-filled, confident men that just naturally attract women.
I teach men how to transform themselves and become attractive, confident, passionate men from the INSIDE. Not just “fake it ‘till they make it” on the outside.
There is a reason that modern Pick Up Artistry is a great thing to learn and it’s that like every man who enters the community, becomes a misogynistic monster.
Some men enter the community as socially anxious nerds that aren’t comfortable talking to a cashier at a store and even if they don’t become the worlds greatest PUA, they learn enough to take a few steps forward in their own personal development.
An analogy I always love to tell people is one of a Professional Driving School.
Let’s say you want to become a professional race car driver.
So you sign up for a course that teaches you the skills to become a professional driver over 1 weekend.
You go there and listen, you take notes, you study and apply what you learned into your driving and next thing you know, the weekend is over.
Are you now a professional race car driver?
But you probably are a better driver than you were before.
At the end of the day, all men should learn how to be confident, how to be attractive, and how to be seductive at some point in their life.
Today’s world of self-developing men who are learning how to attract women is NOT just teaching cruel men to see women as sex objects.
The most attractive qualities in a man are his abilities to be better tomorrow than he is today and be at great sex.
Two things I believe we can all agree upon 😉
>>>Click the link above for more insight into the Psyche of the Modern-day Man<<<
Peace out Girl Scouts,